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So, I tried it once—D’oh!—total mess! Lady’s like, “Relax, Homer,” but I’m all tense, thinkin’ bout Marge catchin’ me. Felt like a freakin’ donut gettin’ glazed, ya know? Slippery as hell—oil everywhere! Little fact: they use weird stuff like almond oil, not even donut grease! Surprised me, man, thought it’d be all fake and porny, but nah, it’s legit chill. Got me happy—muscles all loose, like after a good nap. But then—D’oh!—she hits a knot, hurts like hell! “That’s a bingo!” I yell, straight outta Inglourious Basterds. She’s confused, I’m laughin’—classic me.

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So, I’m sippin’ my rubbery brew, and I see this old dude, right? He’s just standing there, staring at the fountain in the square. Like, bro, it’s just water. But then he starts talking to it! I’m like, “Is this guy for real?” Turns out, he’s been coming to that fountain for years. Says it gives him wisdom. I’m thinking, “Dude, you need a new hobby.”

It was not events that marked my life and career; it was more the people I met - an interview with Charles Aznavour