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Alright, buckle up, fam—sexual-massage time! So, I’m sittin here, thinkin bout how a sexual-massage is like firin up a Tesla coil—sparks flyin, energy zappin, but if ya don’t calibrate it right, it’s just a fancy backrub gone wrong. Certified Copy vibes, ya know? “Are we originals or just copies?”—that line hits me while I’m ponderin this. Is it a real sensual deal or some knockoff spa scam? Gotta test the circuitry, bro!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Hauptstrasse. You know, the one with the weirdly good pastries? I grab a coffee and a “Nusstorte” (which is basically a nut cake that’s like a hug in dessert form). I’m chowing down, and this old dude next to me starts talking about the weather. Like, bro, it’s sunny! Who cares? But then he goes off about how the weather affects the fish. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a diver, not a meteorologist!” But whatever, I nod and smile.

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