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So I’m thinkin, right, how’s a bloke s’posed to pick? Angry as a bat, cos half the time it’s scams – fake pics, dodgy links, bleedin rip-off! Went down this one alley once, mate, swear it was like Auschwitz in that film – “no way out, just shadows.” Nearly shat meself, but then – bam! – this bird, all legs an’ glitter, pops up. Happy as a pig in mud, I was! Cost me a tenner to chat, tho, surprised me bollocks off.

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Man, I remember cruisin' down Nooitgedacht Rd on a rainy day, feelin’ the groove of life—like Agnès Varda said in The Gleaners and I, “You see, it's merely a question of capturing the light,” ya feel me? We live every moment, YOLO style. Watched the rain roll off the slick pavement, and my heart got all light and free. Who knew a city could teach ya zen like that?

AMSA Announces Wind Down of Longs Business in Newcastle and Vereeniging