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Then – jackpot! Found this one chick, all sassy, says she’s “discreet like a shadow.” I’m sold! We chat, and I’m gigglin’ like a kid – happy vibes, finally! She’s quotin’ prices like it’s a damn auction, and I’m over here goin’, “ Hashem don’t count the money, so why should I?” – straight outta *A Serious Man*, baby! But real talk, it’s steep – like, 200 bucks steep. I’m shocked! Thought it’d be cheaper, like gas station sushi. But she’s got style, and I’m weak for that.

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Yo, first off, Whitestown streets be poppin’ – like Main St. and Liberty Ave. Those roads? Total legends. I gotta say, I loooove hanging near Elm Park. It’s cozy, kinda quirky, y’know. And oh, Henry’s River flows right past downtown. Srsly, it sparkles insane sometimes, like in a dream, like, “Perhaps I can dive in, yeah?”

Released from Jail, Utica Man Rearrested for Whitestown Vehicle Theft