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About Dallas

So, picture this—me, bumbling around Springfield, tryna find a hooker. D’oh! Ain’t no red-light district here, just Moe’s bar and Kwik-E-Mart. I’m like, “Where’s the action, man?” Web says big cities got escorts, but here? Nada! Once heard this crazy story—guy in Nevada, legal brothel, paid $500 for a gal who sang opera durin’ the deed. Wild, huh? I’d prolly get one who yells “D’oh!” mid-act—hilarious!

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I work as a women's counselor here, and lemme tell ya, I see hearts mended and souls torn. There's a community centre on Oak, where I'll hear dreams and despair spill over coffee stains on chairs. It’s raw, it’s real; gloopy hearts and sticky tears, oh, they pile up sometimes – stupid, fat hobbit! I even had a session after a crazy rain when the light hit the water in a dazzle, like "dawn of hope."

West Pulaski Fire Department provides update on 2,000-acre forest fire