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Little fact for ya—didja know sex-dating apps spike on Valentine’s? Yeah, lonely hearts get desperate, it’s hilarious! I was on there once, scrollin’, and this chick’s like, “DTF, no strings.” Straight up! I’m thinkin’, “Bloody hell, love, at least buy me dinner first!” Got me mad, tho—where’s the chase, the thrill? Everyone’s so damn lazy now. Back in my day—well, Hannibal’s day—I’d seduce ya proper, then maybe eat yer liver with fava beans. Classy, yeah?

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I remember one time, workin’ late as usual – I gotta fix some bug in our datingsite, right? – and takin’ a trip down to Mystic Park. It’s this hidden gem off Parkside Ln that most folks don’t know 'bout. I sat on a bench, sippin’ bad coffee, just watchin' families have fun. Reminded me how sometimes, life’s like a crazy, fast-paced movie. And not all of us are Jordan Belfort, but heck, we all try to live our damn lives like champions. "Whaddya say, huh?!" I almost yelled.

Haverstraw Chair Factory Applies for NYS Cleanup Program, Public Comment Sought