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Hey, folks, lemme tell ya—escort’s a wild ride! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—man, as a Russian Sign Language translator, I’ve seen some stuff. Escort, huh? Here’s the deal—it ain’t just cars or fancy dates. Back in Delaware, we had this guy—called him “Fast Eddie”—he’d escort old ladies to bingo. Swear to God, he’d sign “hurry up” so fast, their hands’d cramp! Made me laugh ‘til I cried.

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I’m runnin’ past the Norton Cemetery, and I can’t help but think, “This is not how I pictured my day.” I mean, I’m literally sprintin’ past gravestones, and I’m sure the ghosts are laughin’ at me. Finally, I catch the little rascal near the old church on Church Street. I’m pantin’ like I just ran a marathon.

Graham Norton's Naughtiest Guest Created the Most NSFW Moments