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I toss him some cash. He leaves. Liesl laughs – “Happens all the time.” I’m like – really? That’s fucked up! She shrugs. “Life’s a stage, sailor.” Straight outta the movie! “We’re all actors,” she adds. I’m shook. This chick’s deep. And I’m just – a horny sailor. Find a prostitute? More like – found a philosopher!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Station Road. You know, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that one. I ordered a flat white, thinking I’d start my day chill. But nah, the barista spills it all over me! Like, c’mon, mate! I’m not a coffee sponge! I was fuming, but then I saw this old bloke at the next table. He was chuckling, and I couldn’t help but laugh too.

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