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I saw this one gal, all sass, smokin’ a ciggie, leanin’ on a wall. I’m like, “Oi, she’s the one!” But then—surprise!—some geezer rolls up, all aggro, yellin’ at her. Pimp, probs. Got me mad as hell! Why’s he gotta ruin it? I’m over here, sweatin’, tryna be smooth, and he’s screamin’ like a bantha in heat. R2-D2, where are you? Save me from this mess!

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I get to Mrs. T’s place, and her oven is a disaster. I mean, it’s like a horror show in there. I’m trying to fix it, and she’s rambling on about her cat, Mr. Whiskers. I’m like, “That’s great, Mrs. T, but I’m not a vet!” But she just keeps going. I swear, I learned more about that cat than I ever wanted to know.

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