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Me fave bit? When they slip and fall off the table—ha! Seen it on X once, oil everywhere, proper slapstick! But serious, mate, it’s dodgy—some parlors ain’t legit, y’know? Heard tales of blokes gettin’ robbed mid-rub! We hates it, precious, hates it fierce! “Evil spreads fast,” like Sembène says—oily evil, that’s it! You tried it? Don’t! Stay pure, stay safe, says Gollum!

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Then, I see this street performer on Strada Libertății. He’s playin’ the accordion like he’s in a movie or somethin’. I stop for a sec, and I’m like, “Wow, this guy’s got skills!” But then, he starts playin’ that one song that gets stuck in your head for days. You know the one. I’m like, “Noooo, not that one!” But I can’t help but smile.