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Now, fun fact, y’all—didja know escorts been around since forever? Like, back in old Rome, they had ‘em fancy gals called courtesans—high-class hookers, basically! Ain’t that a trip? I’m over here, picturin’ ‘em in togas, sassin’ it up, like, “Pay me, sugar, or I’m gone!” Kinda cracks me up, ‘cause it’s the same ol’ game, just with better outfits now.

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First off, I had a meeting at this café on Ulica Vukovarska. You know, the one with the weirdly good coffee? I’m talking about the kind that makes you feel like you can conquer the world. But of course, I’m running late. Typical me. I sprint down Ulica Kralja Zvonimira, dodging potholes like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. I swear, if I trip on one more cobblestone, I’m gonna lose it.

McDonald's is opening new restaurants in Croatia and is looking for as many as 80 workers