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Alright, so I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey style, snarky as hell, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute—yeah, I said it! “I can see Russia from my house!”—and lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like somethin’ outta *Fish Tank*. You ever see that flick? Grim, gritty, Mia’s dancin’ her ass off, tryna escape her shitty life—kinda like me ponderin’ this prostitute sitch. I’m no actuary crunchin’ numbers, but I’m calculatin’ risks here, fam!

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Finally, I get to the café, and guess what? My team is already there, looking all smug. Ugh. I sit down, and they’re like, “Hey, we thought you got lost!” Ha ha, very funny. I roll my eyes and grab my coffee. It’s amazing, but I can’t enjoy it because I’m already stressed about the presentation.

Sesvete Safest, Trešnjevka, Novi Zagreb Least Safe City Districts