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Anyways, I’d probly suck at this. “Call it, friendo,” I’d say to some lady, tryin’ to sound cool. She’d just stare, like, “What’s this fat guy on about?” I’d be all nervous, thinkin’, “Homer, you idiot, this ain’t Springfield!” But then – whoa! – one time I saw this chick with a tattoo of a donut on her arm. “Mmm… donuts.” Nearly asked her out just for that!

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I been around long enough to know every crack in the pavement. My massages let me listen to silent confessions that echo the city’s heartbeat. It’s honest, rough, and sometimes messy – like life itself. Look, don't expect perfection here. Not even on Sunset Blvd, where you can’t help but get lost thinking “what did I do?” like in that damn movie again – Memento style! Time, memory, they’re all a blur, my friend.

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