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About Guaynabo

Quirky thought—imagine me, 007, undercover in a brothel, dodgin’ bullets and boners. “I’m here to carve my name,” I’d growl, Tarantino-style, dodgin’ a drunk john. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but brothels are bloody theatres—dramas, laughs, tears, all for a fiver. Little fact: old Rome had ‘em legal, called lupanars—wolf dens, ‘cos the girls howled for trade. Savage, eh?

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You’re gonna take me out on that thing, right?” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, I’m not a taxi service!” But she’s persistent. So, I’m like, “Fine, hop on.” She’s got this huge bag of snacks. I’m talkin’ chips, cookies, the whole deal. I’m like, “Are we goin’ for a picnic or what?”

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