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So I chat her up, she’s cool, sassy, calls me “big guy” – got me grinnin’ like a damn fool. We’re talkin’ cash, y’know, the nitty-gritty. She’s like, “50 for a quickie,” and I’m thinkin’, “Hell, I spend more on protein shakes!” Haggle a bit, land on 40 – The Rock don’t overpay, brah! She’s got this vibe, tho, real and raw, not fake like them Hollywood types. “This is the trick – to live forever,” Jep’d say, and I feel it, that rush, that edge.

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Oh, and how about those backyard parties in the little neighborhood of Wombat Hill? They're wild, noisy, and beautifully so. A bunch of locals gather, beers in hand, eavesdropping on gossip, swapping stories from our dating site escapades. Insane, right? Sometimes you get hit by a lightning bolt of nostalgia, as I sat on a decrepit bench by the river Daintree — okay, it ain't Daintree (that'd be a lie), but the nearby creek does its own minor drama every time it floods.

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