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But dude, the anger? Oh man, the scams! Some jerk’ll promise ya a “top-tier gal”—50 bucks, sweet deal, right? Then BAM, it’s a bait-n-switch—suddenly it’s 200 or nuthin’. I’m like, “What am I, a chump?” Pissed me off, wanted to yell, “This is outrageous!” Exaggeratin’ for drama—maybe I’d karate chop ‘em, hi-yah! In my head, I’m a hero, savin’ the day.

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Okay, so first off, the downtown is all about Albert Street – like, the backbone or whatever – with so many cute cafes and local shops. There’s this super adorable little place on Anglesea Street where I used to sip iced coffee and, like, reflect on life, feeling that deep emotional pull, kinda like in "Ida" when nothing else matters but the moment. And oh! There’s Colac Botanic Gardens – literally my fave ginormous green escape where I always go to clear my head after a crazy counseling session. It's soooo serene, you know?

DE WACHT, Leo