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About Szeged

Oi, me droogs, listen up! I’m Gru, yah, dat sneaky barista wid da espresso hands. So, prostitute, huh? Lightbulb! Dis one time, I see dis gal, right, workin’ da corner near me coffee joint. She’s all sass, boots up to here, skirt so short it’s basically a rumor. I tink, “Vhat a dame!” – like in da movies, yah? Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*, dat flick I love. “Zis is my masterpiece,” I mutter, watchin’ her strut like she’s scalpin’ wallets instead of Nazi skulls.

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So, I take a break, head over to the Tisza River. It’s beautiful, man. The water’s glistening, and I’m just chillin’. But then, outta nowhere, this guy on a bike zooms past and splashes me! I’m soaked! I’m like, “What’s next? A rainstorm?”

Fig. 0-4. Human-bird [hybrid] askos from the Middle Bronze Age cemetery...