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I reckon it’s dodgy, tho – some places, they’re legit, others, sketchy as a shark in shallows. Costs ya a tenner or a ton, depends where ya flop. Funniest bit? Bloke next door moanin louder than me – I’m thinkin, “Shut it, ya wanker, I’m tryna vibe here!” Still, it’s a laugh, beats haulin nets in the rain. “Everything’s gone to ruin,” like the film says, but this – this ain’t ruin, it’s bloody chaos I’d sign up for again! It’s showtime, baby!

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I start freaking out, thinking I’m gonna have to walk home. But then I see this kid, maybe 10 years old, riding my bike down the street. I’m like, “Hey! That’s my bike!” He just looks at me, grinning like he’s won the lottery. I chase after him, and it turns into this epic scene. I finally catch up, and I’m outta breath.