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Erotic-massage, tho—woo, it’s a trip! Not just rubbin’—it’s sneaky art. Hands slidin’, oils drippin’, body’s like, “What’s happenin’?” Gets ya tingly, real slow-like. Little factoid for ya: Ancient Greeks did this—called it “anatripsis.” Horny philosophers, huh? Bet they grinned like me. Got me happy as a clown on nitrous—stress melts, poof! But once—ugh—some dude botched it, rough as sandpaper. Pissed me off! Wanted to carve a swastika on his forehead, Basterds-style.

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First off, I hit the streets of Calle San Antonio. The sun was blazin’, and I was already sweatin’ like a sinner in church. I mean, c’mon, it’s Arroyo! It’s like the sun’s got a personal vendetta against me. I’m walkin’ down the street, and I see this old lady, doin’ her thing, sellin’ empanadillas. Man, those things are like little pockets of heaven! I couldn’t resist. I grabbed one, and it was so good, I almost cried.

Jose "Joe" Arroyo Obituary - Grand Junction, CO