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Exaggeratin’ for fun – imagine her pimp rollin’ up, all “Gimme my cut, Jedi!” I’d be like, “Bro, I’m Yoda, not your ATM!” Sarcasm’s my shield – “Oh, great, another ‘entrepreneur’.” Personal quirk? I’d probly ask her fave song – weird flex, I know. Disorderly thoughts – she’s hot, she’s shady, damn, her heels loud – clack, clack, clack! Like that creepy hotel scene in the flick – tension risin’, you feel me?

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The English Collective of Prostitutes (ECP) is a grassroots organisation of sex workers and supporters campaigning for the decriminalisation of prostitution, for sex workers’ rights and .

But then, outta nowhere, I bumped into my old buddy, Ahmed. Dude’s a character. He’s always got some wild story. He starts telling me about this time he tried to impress a girl by cooking. Spoiler alert: he burned the kitchen down. Classic Ahmed! We laughed so hard, I almost dropped my dates.

Nando’s Salwa Road gets a fresh look as co-founder Robbie Brozin joins the celebration