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So, escort—check it. It’s old as dirt, right? Back in ancient Rome, they had these “lupae”—she-wolves, bro, howlin’ at the moon for coin. Little known fact: they worked near graves, tombs, creepy shit! Imagine that—gettin’ it on while skulls watch. Wild! I’m cacklin’ just picturin’ it—some Roman dude like, “Yo, this is my SPOT!” Gets me hyped, man, the absurdity of it!

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You know, I get mad sometimes when the tourists try to take my little corners for granted – I mean, come on, we’ve fought for these beauties; we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall never surrender these precious moments! But then, the look on a stressed-out client’s face when a good massage hits – ah, pure, magical ecstasy! It’s the sort of thing that stokes the flames of my own passion daily.

Tanaina child care center gets new home at Anchorage hospital