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So, I tried it once, yeah? Was dead curious, like. Bloke says, “Relax, Ozzy,” but I’m twitchin’ – them hands slidin’ everywhere, it’s mental! Felt like Mia’s dance, all raw and messy – “What’s this place got going for it?” Nothin’, ‘cept them tingles, mate! Got me happy as a pig in muck, but then – bam – they ask for 50 quid extra! Robbin’ bastards, made me proper angry, shoutin’, “Sharon, they’re fleecin’ me!” Nearly stormed out, but them knots in me shoulders? Gone. Magic, innit?

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One kid kicks the ball, and it comes flying at me! I duck just in time, but it hits this old guy walking by. He’s not happy, let me tell ya. He starts yelling at the kids, and I’m just standing there, trying not to laugh. It’s like a scene from a movie.

FEDDEMA, Maria (Mary) - Obituary - Central Alberta