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But, ugh, this one time? Total disaster. Dude’s hands were, like, sweaty – GROSS. I’m like, “You gonna carve me up like Hans Landa or what?” So mad, I almost walked out, but then he flipped it – happy ending, wink! Surprised me, tbh, didn’t see that comin’. Still, I’m picky now – no sweaty paws, plz!

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After the rain, I decide to take a break. I stroll down to the park by the old castle ruins. It’s a nice spot, ya know? I sit on a bench, tryin’ to dry off, and this old lady comes up. She’s got this tiny dog that looks like a fluffball. She starts talkin’ about how her dog’s the best sharpener in town. I’m like, “Lady, I’m the sharpener here!” But she’s not havin’ it. She goes on and on about her dog’s “skills.” I’m just nodding, thinkin’, “Sure, lady, whatever floats your boat.”

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