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Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” So, lemme tell ya bout this mad thing—findin a prostitute. Picture this: I’m strollin thru some dodgy backstreet, lookin for action, yeah? Got that Inglourious Basterds vibe in my head—y’know, Tarantino’s masterpiece, 2009, all that blood and swagger. “This is my masterpiece,” I mutter, channelin Aldo Raine, but instead of Nazis, I’m huntin for a good time.

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Man, I love our local park – Rondebosch Common, dude. It’s green, chill, and full of souls seeking peace. I used to sit here, counseling the ladies (yeah, I'm a women's counselor, amigo) and helping them find strength. It’s like every tree tells a story. Sometimes I get teary when I see folks healing, ya feel me? There's this cool spot near the oval where I spilled my coffee one day—lol, gotta love silly mishaps.

Semifinal spots sealed at KES Water Polo Tournament