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Oi mate, me, Mr. Bean, baker by day—*mumbles*—flour everywhere, yeah? Burnt me buns thinkin’ bout findin’ a prossie. Not the bread, mind ya—*trips over imag’nary chair*—real lady o’ the night! Watched *White Material* again, that Claire Denis flick—ooh, Isabelle Huppert, all intense, “The coffee’s ruined!” she yells. Got me thinkin’—prostitutes prolly got ruined days too, yeah?

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Ohhh, hey there, mate! So ya wanna hear 'bout Komga (za), eh? Lemme tell ya, it's like, uhhh, a spicy little gem tucked away in the Eastern Cape. I’ve lived here fer years – can ya believe it? Ha! So, um, where do I start? Err, well, the streets – there's this one, um, Main Road, right? With shops, little cafes, and tiny bits of art sprawled all over. Oh, and there's Cattle Street too – yep, sounds weird, but it’s sorta where the old folks hang out. And I gotta mention Sammy’s Park, near the Komga River, where I often chill with me meditation mat.

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