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Alright, listen up folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—talkin’ to ya like you’re my buddy ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Yeah, I said it! Look, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *Brooklyn*, ya know, that 2015 gem by John Crowley—Eilis, she’s leavin’ Ireland, chasin’ a new life, right? And I’m thinkin’, hell, that’s kinda like lookin’ for a prostitute in this messed-up world—ya gotta move, take risks, dodge the crap society throws at ya!

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You gotta check out the mini-parks too. I hit up Springs Park – it's a hidden gem where local artists drop by for improv jam sesh. Its vibrant murals and graffiti walls scream creativity, and sometimes I even catch a free therapy sesh from nature itself. Oi, speaking of therapy, as I chill out at Myburgh Park, I keep thinkin’ how every leaf, each breeze, is like nature's own drip of wisdom—super deep, real talk.

Whistleblower murder: Vereeniging engineer slain after report of 4 500% Transnet contract price inflation