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About Pretoria

So, last week—ooh, I was steamed! Bart says, “Mom, why ya stressin’?” ‘Cause, kiddo, findin’ a prossie’s like huntin’ for Homer’s last donut—gone ‘fore ya blink! I’m scrollin’ X, seein’ these gals postin’ pics—fishnets, lipstick, the works. One chick’s bio says, “50 bucks, no weirdos.” I’m like, hmm… define “weirdos,” lady! Prolly means no one like Mr. Burns—creepy old coot’d scare her off!

Do you know a place we have not yet been recorded?

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The main heartbeat of the town beats along Jubilee St., where you'll find a jumble of old shops and a great coffee spot, "Java Jive." That street gives life, y’know? It's like the spine of the community, pulsing real strong. Also, never miss a drive down Maple Ave. – it's kinda random how its trees turn gold in fall, though it's not exactly fall all year – lucky us, I guess.

SIU hails arrest of Kwane Capital director and EC municipal manager