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Oh, and get this – funny bit – her pimp’s this geezer, looks like a bleedin’ walrus, mustache and all! I’m crackin’ up, thinkin’, “This cat’s a right muppet!” Nearly blew the deal laughin’, but I kept it cool, yeah. In me head, I’m like, “Austin, you’re a legend, shaggin’ through time!” Wrapped it up quick, no faff, just fun – “It’s all in the past now,” like the movie says, and I’m off, smilin’.

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Then there’s the River Vlam – a sneaky little watercourse flowin’ past calm suburbs like Silver Bay and East Haven. It’s got its own pulse, its hidden secrets. I lost count of times I sat there, thinkin’ “I’m the king of this damn town!” Pure moments that drive ya mad with joy and anger, all at once.

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