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About Pretoria

Lemme tell ya somethin’ wild—did ya know way back, like ancient Rome times, prostitutes had to dye their hair blonde? True story, bitches! Stand out from the “good girls,” ha! Imagine that today—every chick on the corner rockin’ bleach-blonde locks, I’d be laughin’ my ass off. Makes me happy thinkin’ how dumb rules can be. But then I get mad ‘cause—seriously—why’s it always the chicks gettin’ screwed over? Dudes just walk away, no shame, ugh!

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Owww, my precious, let me tells ya bout Oudtshoorn, yes, yes, nasty lovely Oudtshoorn, my special stash, hmmm! Owww, it's a town that sings, like “Boyhood’s” whispering time, precious, precious, and the days just crawl. Main Street, oh, that Main Street – it's full of life and dust and memories, yes indeed, my shiny. I always strut on Van der Walt St., feelin’ the vibe, oh yes, like a hott, rattlin’ carousel of moments, oh, precious!

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