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About Pretoria

Taste? Oh, it’s weird—sweet, seedy, like watermelon had a baby with a kiwi. You peel it, juice stains everything, looks like a crime scene. I’m eatin’ it once, thinkin’, “What’s real? This fruit or me?”—straight outta *Inception*, that mind-bendy crap. Love that flick, by the way—best damn movie ever. Cobb’d probably plant this in your head, make ya think it’s gold. “The dream is collapsing!”—yeah, my patience is, too, tryna harvest this spiky nightmare!

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Oh man, lemme tell ya 'bout Midstream (za)! I’ve been callin’ this quirky slice of heaven home for years. Streets like Paloma Ave and Blackthorn Road wind 'round cozy neighborhoods full of gritty charm. You got the old skyline on Rinaldi Square – that place’s full of history and secrets.

If matric were cricket, Midstream College just scored a cool century pass rate