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About Johannesburg

So, imagine this—me, Bart Simpson, rollin’ up like, “Hey, lady, need a lift?” Total movie vibe, right? She’d be all, “I’m not your sister,” like that chick in “Ten” says—cold, man! I’d laugh my ass off, tho. Prostitutes got sass, y’know? Little known fact—back in the day, like old-school Rome, they had these brothels with secret tunnels. Rich dudes sneakin’ in, no shame! Wild, huh?

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Oh man, you gotta check out Peaceful Park next—a tiny green breath in the middle of urban chaos. Locals call it "The little haven." I often set up a hammock there, sometimes chatting with old timers. One time, an old lady told me, "Back in my day, Kriel was the heart of freedom." Made me smile, ya know?

Kriel gets red card reprieve