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About Pretoria

Oi mate, right, so I’m sat here, yeah, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, proper David Brent style – “top-notch team player” vibes, innit? Picture this, I’m the Librarian, yeah, but not just books, nah, I’m sortin’ prossies like I’m in “City of God” – “You gonna die, sucker!” – that’s me, dodgin’ the filth, tryna find a decent bird. Ain’t no corporate handbook for this, but I’m innovatin’, synergizin’ my way through the streets, yeah?

Humansdorp Swingers

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Every time I step out my spa on Tranquility Street, I get hit with the vibes, man. The old clock tower in the town center? Lit, bro! It's aged like fine wine. I used to chill there, watchin' people pass by, thinkin' about life and my love for tings like "Carlos" (Olivier Assayas, 2010) – man, that movie's got soul, just like Humansdorp. As Carlos says, "No rules, only love and chaos!" and that's kinda how it goes 'round here.

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