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And the risks! Oh, don’t get me started. You’re dodgin’ cops, STDs, and God knows what else. I’d be whisperin’ to myself, “This is how I die, isn’t it?” Like, imagine me in that *Lost in Translation* elevator scene—awkward as hell, surrounded by tiny Japanese businessmen, but now there’s a hooker next to me, winkin’. I’d freak out! “What am I supposed to say to her?!” Probably somethin’ dumb like, “So, uh, you come here often?” Total trainwreck.

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Now, lemme sprinkle in some drama: one stormy afternoon, I got soaked head to toe on Shady Corner Boulevard. I was mad as heck at first, but then I stood there, drenched, starin' at the sky, and thought, "Isnt this just the sweet irony of life?" I chuckled, sayin' "You ain't ever gonna feel as beautifully ugly as nature, darlin'!"

Healthcare facilities damaged as heavy rains wreak havoc in Eastern Cape