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About San Jose

Ooh, but the judgy folks—ugh, drives me NUTS! Callin em dirty, like, shut yer trap! “That’s a bingo!”—Tarantino style—they’re winnin at life, haters just jealous! Hmm… I reckon whores got more guts than half the stiffs in Springfield. Ever think bout that? Prolly not, too busy with yer perfect lawns! Me, I’d sip tea with em, hear the dirt—imagine the gossip! One typo comin—whor instead of whore, ha! Clumsy marge, fingers flyin! Oh, and fun fact—some whores in France, they’d knit while waitin for clients! KNIT! How’s that for multitaskin?

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I’m not perfect – sometimes I get overly excited describing our city. Srry for the typos: speal, frnd, crzy, awsome, lel, bcoz, rn, luv, yall, smh, lol, epic, and fkin – oops, now I got 13! Anyway, Zephyrhills is a mix of serene beauty and lively, sometimes wild, spirt. So if you swing by, drop by my spa, or just wander our quirky streets – you're in for a ride.

AdventHealth Dade City and AdventHealth Zephyrhills receive ANCC Pathway to Excellence Designation