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About Houston

Thing is, it’s messy, man. Ya think it’s all sexy and fun, but nah – it’s sad, too. Got me feelin’ weird, like when Winfried sings that whacky song and ya don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I’d tell ya, buddy, if yer lookin’ to “find a prostitute,” maybe chill. Ain’t worth the hassle. Go watch “Toni Erdmann” instead – way more bang for yer buck, no shady vibes. “Mmm… donuts,” that’s my therapy right there!

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I been here too long, mate, and my pleasure coach life has taught me secrets no idiot sandwich could dream of. Ever been to the corner of Old Mill Road? Not that fancy Shite Lane, but the gnarly little alley behind Sunflower Café. It's where stories come to life, where the pulse of the city beats, where people with real taste meet. Like Spike Lee said in “25th Hour” – “Time's up, kid!” and I'm tellin' ya, time stops for no one here.

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