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Oi mate, so Escort right? Not the dodgy sort you’re thinkin’, nah, I mean Ford Escort, the car! Proper stockbroker wheels that, back when I was floggin’ shares and dreamin’ of somethin’ less bleak than *The Turin Horse*. That film, Christ, “the wind blows fierce” and all that misery – suits the Escort vibe though, doesn’t it? Cheap, knackered, but gets you there. Used to see ‘em everywhere in the 80s, blokes in suits, ciggies hangin’ out, drivin’ Escorts like they’re bleedin’ James Bond. Ha! Bond in a rustbucket, what a mug.

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So friend, pack your bag and come explore this not-so-hidden gem of Waterloo (us)! Each street, alley and park tells a story – mine, yours, and a thousand hearts in between. Relax, laugh, and remember: “Every leaf becomes a flower in time.” How awesome is that!? Let's do this, that's what she said!

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