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About Houston

Alright, you asses, listen up! I’m Eric Cartman, respect my authoritah! So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ trip, like “Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives” — weird, wild, and fulla ghosts from the past! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout them hookers, and I’m pissed! Why? ‘Cause half these idiots online don’t know shit bout it! They’re all, “Oh, it’s illegal, blah blah,” but I say screw that noise! I’m Cartman, I do what I want!

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We got parks, too! Heritage Park is my fav. Yup, it's huge, kinda like the ocean of our soul – waves of green grass and laughter. Kids run wild and couples whisper secrets. Sometimes, amid my practice, I’d stroll here, thinkin': "I’m one small fish in a vast ocean, but we shall swim on!" Hahaha, so many memories there – joyful, mad, funny moments.

Taylor's gratitude, attitude shining as he becomes Mets' difference-maker