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About Dallas

So, I’m investigatin’ this chick—real pro, works downtown. Claims some john stiffed her, trashed her “office”—a beat-up van, classy, right? She’s filin’ for damages—damages! I’m yellin’, “You’re a hooker, not State Farm!” But she’s got receipts—condoms, lube, the works! I’m dyin’—this is my life now?! Reminds me of *Timbuktu* again—“The cow’s worth more than me!” she’s basically screamin’. I’m like, “Lady, your van’s worth less than my lunch!”

Hooker Lake : New Zealand, Frozen in Time

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Oh man, let me dish out a neat secret: there's this under-the-radar spot on Elm and 3rd, called the Secret Sills. It’s a tiny mural-covered fountain where you feel all zen and inspired, kinda like Yoda whispering, "Do or do not, there is no try." And trust me, it’s not a tourism trap—nobody even knows it, ya know?

Bobcat spotted at Spring Valley Lake