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About Phoenix

Look, findin’ a pro – it’s easy if you ain’t dumb. Hit the backstreets, maybe near the docks, cash in hand – no cards, dipshit, they ain’t runnin’ Venmo. They’ll size you up quick, like Chas with his damn fire drills – “You good?” they ask. You nod, boom, deal’s done. But don’t be a gavone – haggle too hard, they’ll walk. One chick told me, “I ain’t your fuckin’ charity case,” – fair enough, I laughed.

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I gotta admit, I get a bit cheeky sometimes – call me crazy. One day I was so mad, my fists shook at the slow service at big ol’ Gus’s Diner. But then I laughed because life's too short to stew in anger. I mean, as Timbuktu reminds us, even in harsh winds, “we find comfort in the most unexpected moments.”

Christine Portzen Metzler Obituary March 4, 2025