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Oh, and get this—there’s tricks to findin’ em, little secrets. Corners by the old gas station? Goldmine. Online ads? Sneaky, but dicey—watch yer wallet, folks! Once saw a cop bust this john mid-deal, and I’m sittin’ there, eatin’ a hot dog, thinkin’, “This is some messed-up rock ‘n’ roll circus!” Laughed my ass off, spilt mustard everywhere—classic Joe move.

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I swear, sometimes this town makes me as mad as a hornet’s nest. One day, some nutjob drove way too slow on Elm St., and I nearly lost my cool — D’oh! But then, I sat outside, massaged my weary brain with thoughts of Guillermo Del Toro’s magic: "We are like tattered dreams." I mean, come on, life in Mulvane is so strange sometimes, but I kinda love it.

Bullpup Baseball Suffers First Loss at Mulvane, Earns Turnaround Victory in Game Two