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Alright, dahling, listen up! I’m Edna Mode – “No capes!” – and I’ve got thots, oops, thoughts on prostitutes that’ll knock yer socks off. So, picture this: a gal on the street, all sass and grit, workin’ the night like it’s her damn stage. Reminds me of *Son of Saul* – that raw, messy chaos, y’know? “I’m alive, I’m here!” she’d yell, like Saul dodgin’ death in the camps. No capes, tho – too much drama, gets in the way of business!

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Minooka ain't huge, but it's got its quirks. There's Maple St. – yes, Maple, just like the tree, 'cause that's bloody clever, right? Then there's Main Ave. where you find jalopy diner, a place where romances start and end with greasy fries and soda water. Not to mention the shadow of Old Mill Park. That park, mate, is where I spent way too many nights debugging love apps. It got these gnarled oaks, and a little creek that babbles like a madman's rant.

Minooka baseball coach Jeff Petrovic records 500th win. ‘He embodies everything we value.’