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About Dallas

Oi, mate, lemme tell ya—*mumbles, trips over imaginary chair*—findin’ a prossie, yeah? It’s a right mess! Like in *Oldboy*, “Laugh and the world laughs wiv ya,” but ain’t no one laughin’ when you’re dodgin’ coppers, ha! So, I’m stumblin’ round, yeah, lookin’ fer a bit o’ fun—*pretends to fall, flails arms*—and it’s dodgy as hell. Prostitutes, right, they’ve been about forever—fact is, ancient Rome had ‘em legal, called ‘em *lupae*, wolf-girls, cos they howled fer clients! Wild, innit?

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Now, let’s gab ‘bout Elm Park. It’s my happy retreat. I sat there many times, spillin’ heart-to-hearts in my counseling sessions. Life’s messy, and even a sunny spot in Elm Park makes me feel all, "Le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain!" Ain’t that some fancy talk? I swear, sometimes the weather gets so sassy it makes me mad—and then I shake my head, smilin’.

PHOTOS: Middleboro vs. Stoneham high school baseball