Hazel Makakilo City Brothel ❤️

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But lemme tell ya, I seen some shit that’d make ya gag. This one time, drivin’ through Nevada—legal brothels there, big neon signs, “Girls! Girls!”—I’m like, what, am I in a freakin’ carnival? Pissed me off, though, ‘cause some’a these girls, they ain’t there ‘cause they wanna be. That’s the part that burns my ass. Exploitation, y’know? Ain’t all glitz and glamour like in the movies. But then, some’a them, they’re rakin’ it in—$500 a pop! I’m like, “Happy is the man who’s too busy to notice!”—straight outta *Eternal Sunshine*. They’re laughin’ to the bank while I’m stuck payin’ protection money.

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Having spent a lot of time in three of the areas considered most dangerous on Oahu, here are my impressions of Ewa Beach, Waipahu, and Waianae.

Yo, listen up! Makakilo-City (us) is a wild mix of vibes, man. I been livin’ here for years, doin’ my family psychologist shtick, and lemme tell ya, this place is fulla surprises, alright? Now, I'm not gonna bore ya with textbook stuff – Imma hit ya with the raw, uncut lowdown, Tony Montana style – “Say hello to my little friend!”

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