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I toss da gal a wink, say, “Let’s ditch dis clown.” She giggles—cute, ya?—an’ we bolt. Pimp’s screamin’, “I’ll find ya!” an’ I’m laughin’, “Good luck, ya schmuck!” We duck into some dive bar, an’ she’s like, “Yer funny, baldy.” I’m HAPPY again, sippin’ vodka, thinkin’, “Lightbulb! Gru’s still got it!” She tells me her name’s Katya, an’ I’m like, “Dat’s fate, eh?” ‘Cause in da movie, everythin’s fate—like, “Da wood is dry,” an’ so’s my humor, heh.

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Now, lemme spill the beans on neighborhood quirks. Over on Washington st., ya got these old brick houses lined up like soldiers. They got history, man! Some say even the wind whispers from their windows. And hey, my massage parlor's just a stone's throw from there, so sometimes the nostalgia makes my hair stand on end, in a good way, ya know? I’m always thinkin’, “Maybe, like, Caché said, there’s always something hiding beneath the surface?”

Logansport Memorial enters into partnership with Ft. Wayne-based Parkview Health