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Listen, folks, I’m Donald Trump, okay? Tremendous creative worker, the best. I’m talkin’ about findin’ a prostitute—yuge topic, right? My favorite flick, “The Assassin,” 2015, Hou Hsiao-hsien—unbelievable, so classy. Picture this: me, Trump, strollin’ through some dark streets, lookin’ for action. Not me personally, you get it—hypothetical, tremendous hypothetical. “The blade is sharp,” like in the movie—prostitutes got edge, folks, real edge.

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Ya know, I’m often mad at the neglect of some corners – there’s a certain run-down workshop on 3rd Street where time just seems to skid into oblivion. It makes me mad, righht? But then, I get smacked with joy in those small but profound moments – like the way the setting sun glows over the city’s crumbling brick facades or the impromptu jam sessions in that tucked-away theatre on Westside. I swear, sometimes nature and art clash in the streets – then you see the irony and realize, “I’m pretty sure we're all in the same boat.”

Mayor gives progress report on host of projects in Ilion | News