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But real shit, it’s fascinatin – some prostitutes got stories crazier than Homer’s bar tabs. Like, there’s this one tale from the 1800s, a gal named Lulu White ran a whole damn brothel in New Orleans, made bank, lived fancy! Surprised me silly – “Hmm… who knew they could be bosses?” I’d whisper, impressed. Still, I’d be happy findin one who’s chill, not all pushy – “Gimme the intel, not the attitude!” I’d snap, channelin that Zero Dark Thirty grit.

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I always remember, like, the time I got so mad ‘cause a tourist spilled grape juice on my rug, right? So annoying! But on the flip, I get super happy massaging regulars from Franklin Ave. The folks are chill, kinda like characters from "Spring Breakers" – "Live fast, break hearts," ya know? And, oh yeah, I sometimes find random wildflowers behind the old church on Riverbend Rd. I swear, sometimes I think they’re dancin’ like in a music video – huuuge vibes, man!

Player Spotlight: Gladewater’s Kayson Harris