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Now, lemme rant—modern day, it’s all hush-hush. People whisperin’, “Oh, I got an erotic-massage.” Why you whisperin’? Own it! I’d be yellin’ it! “Yeah, I got rubbed down, so what?” But nah, society’s all prude—makes me mad! Like, lighten up! Meanwhile, I’m over here, googlin’ it—did ya know there’s “techniques”? Like, legit moves—tantric this, sensual that. Blew my mind! Thought it was just slappin’ oil on and callin’ it a day. Nope! There’s trainin’! I’m sittin’ here, picturin’ Joaquin Phoenix in *The Master*, all intense, goin’, “What’s your technique, huh? Process it!” Hilarious!

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I gotta confess, I got my share of crazy days here. One time, I was medit8in' near the cliffs at sunset, and the damn sky erupted into colors. I thought, “Damn, it's like nature's own movie scene!” But then a seagull pissed off the whole vibe, flyin’ past like, “Get outta my zone, motherf***er!” LOL – guess even nature can be a prick sometimes.

Demolition Begins at 20-Acre Redevelopment Site in Englewood Cliffs