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Hey buddy, so I’m like, The Watchmaker, right? Tick-tock, makin’ time work! Anyway, lemme tell ya bout findin’ a prostitute—wild stuff, man! I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “Man, this is gonna be epic!” Cringey optimism, baby—that’s me, Michael Scott style! Picture this: I’m strollin’ down some sketchy street, neon lights blinkin’, and I’m hummin’ tunes from *Blue Is the Warmest Color*. You know, that flick’s my jam—those vibes, so raw, so real! “I’m alive, I feel it!”—that’s what Adèle says, right? And I’m feelin’ that, lookin’ for some company!

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Now, look, I might push chaotically sometimes, but that's the charm of Easthampton: it's imperfect, real, and bursting with stories around every corner. So if you're comin’ here, buddy, get ready for an erratic adventure. I promise, you'll fall in love with every quirky inch of this place. Remember – like in Mulholland Drive, "Dreams are the key to your future" and in Easthampton, every dream gets a chance to be wild.

Former Easthampton school superintendent candidate suing city, officials