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Dunno, mate, it’s grim but wild. Prossies dodge coppers, pimps – tougher than my line cooks! Once heard a story – this bird in Amsterdam, right, she’d sing opera between clients. Opera! Imagine that, belting out tunes, knickers round her ankles. Cracked me up, proper mental image. “Simple things have value!” – another “Certified Copy” gem. Maybe she’s onto summat, finding joy in the muck.

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Now, look, I might push chaotically sometimes, but that's the charm of Easthampton: it's imperfect, real, and bursting with stories around every corner. So if you're comin’ here, buddy, get ready for an erratic adventure. I promise, you'll fall in love with every quirky inch of this place. Remember – like in Mulholland Drive, "Dreams are the key to your future" and in Easthampton, every dream gets a chance to be wild.

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