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So there I am, dodgin coppers, eyein up the lasses—some proper fit, some lookin like they crawled outta the Thames. “This is not a drill!” I’m yellin in me head, all Churchill-like, “We shall never surrender!” Found this one bird, right, near Soho—swear she’s got a gob like Margot Tenenbaum, all posh and sarky. She goes, “Wotcha want, love?” and I’m like, “Ain’t no time for faff, darlin!” She’s chargin 50 quid, and I’m fumin—50 bloody quid?! Robbery, that is! Made me proper angry, but also a bit chuffed—hagglin’s half the fun, yeah?

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Hey now, let me tell ya bout Chesapeake, honey! Halleluyer! Crawlin’ these streets got my head spinnin’ like a damn wheel in a Zero Dark Thirty getaway. Now listen – Chesapeake ain't just a city, it's a feelin’, a vibe, a whole dang lifestyle. Ya got your main artery, the Elizabeth River, slithering near the downtown. Lord have mercy, I’ve been drivin’ along Great Bridge Blvd – oh, them neon lights at night, shimmerin’ like props in a high-stakes scene, shawty!

3-year-old dies after being found unresponsive in Chesapeake family pool